Making Friends!
My last week was spent in the presence of heros, superstars and clowns! Two of my favorite organizations decided to put their annual get-togethers, together. After attending the National Down Syndrome Conference in Orlando, we headed to the Bahamas on the Buddy Cruise. At each event, we enjoyed the company of people with Down Syndrome and their families / friends.
Disney Coronado Hotel
At the Disney Coronado Hotel, the NDSC Conference workshops were mixed with Disney characters and sunshine. I attended the pre-conference sessions for NDSC Affiliates where we networked with other groups to see what they are doing for their prospective groups. I was very excited to hear what the Indiana group is doing to help their adults find jobs. The next day, were the regular sessions with topics ranging from infants to adults along with a film festival. Both nights,
We know how to dance!
there were dances! Along with the workshops, families enjoyed the Disney parks and the swimming pool.
With a stop in Cocoa Beach in between, we headed to the Buddy Cruise, a four day cruise on Royal Caribbean which headed to Nassau, Bahamas. There were about 150 families with a tie to a person with Down Syndrome or disabilities, including Chris Burke (Corky, Life Goes On), and Boise’s own Troy McClain (Apprentice, season one).
Chris Burke and Troy McClain
What a great way to spread awareness of Down Syndrome! The kids and adults with Down Syndrome fit right in with the crowd – dancing, swimming, laughing, and snorkeling. They were definitely “More Alike than Different”! One of our guys even won the Belly Flop contest! We had lots of time to enjoy the ship and the sites amidst the workshops which were awesome! In Nassau, Bahamas, we visited the Bahamian Down Syndrome Association which was a real treat to me.
Becky made lots of new friends – most of them male… Now comes the discussions about relationships!
The next year’s NDSC Conference will be in San Antonio, TX, and the next Buddy Cruise will be a 7 day cruise to Jamaica. How will we ever decide what we want to do??
Proud of her accomplishment at CWI!
Our first session of iDream at CWI ended this week. I know at lease one person who will be waiting on pins and needles for the next session to start in the fall. Becky came home from her last day at school with a Certificate of Completion from “college” and boy was she proud! This is why I do what I do to promote these things!
We are unsure of what the future of iDream will be. Come next fall, we hope to begin more classes, but CWI will have to find the space. We really like being at the central location at the Nampa Campus near the Idaho Center, but they tell us that space there is at a premium.
Our firsts session of classes was not as well attended as we would like, however, I meet people everyday who would have liked to attend. We are working hard to get the word out about iDream so that the college will see how many people it benefits. Last week, the Idaho Press Tribune and the Idaho Statesman ran an article about iDream – we are very grateful!!
Please help us spread the word for next fall. I am hoping to put more smiles on more faces as they have thier own opportunity to “do college”! Direct questions to Barb Case at the CWI Community Education Department, or email me at idthinkcollege@gmail.com
The family ranch
Returning to the Treasure Valley, I am lost in thoughts of West Texas, and a different attitude. There are many feelings, but not many words come to mind to describe it. My logical side says I am just having an identity crisis (something I have had practically all my life) but my instincts tell me that I have come home. I have just been made a managing partner in my birth family’s large land corporation. The Lord has begun a new page in my life and it seems very familiar, yet totally foreign!
Having grown up in the Bay Area of California, West Texas, where I found my birth family, seemed like a foreign country. In the small rural town where they live, there is a much stronger sense of community and heritage. There is a definite sense of independence in these people, but a sense of dependence as well. They depend on God and family in a way that is different from Californians. They are Texans, and then they are Holmans, and proud of it. The history in the area seems to revolve around who owned what land. Their lifestyle is dependant on what their mineral rights are and how the oil business is doing. The economy in West Texas follows its own rules. As my aunt put it, their success or failure is a combination of hard work, and ingenuity, but mainly Providence. What a contrast to California.
Since I was a child, and visited my adoptive grandparents in a small town in Illinois, I have wanted to live in a small community. I guess that is what attracted me to Idaho which seems to be the best of both worlds. We have the smaller population which makes for a stronger sense of community. Meeting people who have lived there for several generations makes me feel that sense of the Treasure Valley’s heritage. Idaho has been the small town atmosphere that I loved in Illinois.
Texas, however, has a personality that fits me. It really does feel like home. The tough hard working people who are willing to take risks are right up my alley. I have always been the wild child, the bull in the china shop, but I could get the job done! I have now met people who are like me! The life long identity search is coming to an end.
The Next Generation
I have found my gene pool and they are Texans who descended from a Texas Ranger who was not only one of the largest land owners in Texas, and president of the Cattleman’s Association, but he also leaves a spiritual heritage. He was a man that was respected and I am proud to be named one of his descendants. From he and his wife came a daughter who married another man who also build a heritage for his family, and from them came another daughter who married another man, my papa who built on their heritage. I have an aunt and uncle who have carried the load for their generation and now my generation is stepping up to the plate to carry on this great tradition. I only hope that we can be as hard working and diligent as they have been. We have been entrusted with more than a land company, we have been entrusted with a heritage. May God help us to pass it all down to the next generation – the business, the history, and the spiritual heritage they have left us.
Is it Nature or is it Nurture?? Families separated by adoption can teach us many things about heredity. Some ongoing debates can be easily won by looking at families who have been separated.
The basic environment vs. heredity debate can be easily won by looking at adoptees who have not been raised in their biological families, but end up just like them. Time and time again, we see adoptees who have grown up with the same likes and dislikes, or good and bad habits, as their biological families. Of course, adoptees also reflect their adoptive families in many ways due to the time spent with them and the training from the parents, however, the similarities in the strangers from biological families is uncanny.
Medical information is the most common reason an adoptee might want to search. A visit to the doctor’s office is always incomplete without medical history. Yes, there are a multitude of physical problems one can inherit from their birth family. I have a form of Spina Bifida (incomplete fusion of the spine), that I inherited from my birth family. Unfortunately, I did not know of their problems until I was preparing for back surgery. My daughter inherited it also, but at least now has the foreknowledge and can chose to be more careful. Unfortunately, she also inherited the risk taker genes from us, so the warning may go unheeded.
Inheriting personality, and medical problems is one thing, but inheriting mental or emotional issues is possible as well. Those who doubt the existance of issues like these, should look at families who have been separated. Multiple children removed from unstable homes, raised in separate homes without contact can all end up with the same issues as the parents. As we know, emotional diagnosis’ can be applied to people who do not deserve this label and these issues will not always be passed down, but these separated families are indicators that these issues are real, and inheritable.
Nurture is a powerful tool in a person’s life. Good parenting and lots of love is required for a child’s emotional and physical health. As an adoptee, I will be eternally grateful for my parent’s nurture of me. My birth mother was not too much of a kid person and may not have been very nurturing. Many people have commented that it was fortunate that I was adopted. Unfortunately, the nurture from my adoptive parents did not nullify my nature inherited from my birth family. Indeed I am grateful to my adoptive parents and do not regret my upbringing, but unfortunately for them, I was a Texan at heart and it showed. They were often frustrated with my high spirited personality. My teenage years mirror those of my birth family. Nurture was not able to overcome those inherited traits.
At 19, God broke through my destructive lifestyle and made Himself known to me. He was able to overcome my nature when nurture could not. I am still learning about myself and my Texas roots, and I am still loved and nurtured by my adoptive mother, but it is God who had the power to change my life’s direction. I am thankful to Him for both my families.
Graduation season is almost as exciting around here as Christmas! Since my kids have been in high school, we have attended high school graduations every year. This year, we got over 10 graduation announcements, 4 graduation ceremonies, and 5 parties! Wow! I love graduation seasons because it is the end of one page, and the beginning of a new one. It is amazing to see what these young adults have done and where they are headed.
Our family has had the privilege of being a part of the Idaho Home School Graduation group for several years. This is the largest home school group in the state that puts on a wonderful ceremony for home schooled kids. This year’s program included musical talents, class speakers, awards for National Merit Scholars, as well as The Honorable Daniel T. Eismann, Chief Justice of the Idaho Supreme Court addressing the class. Mr. Eismann’s address was inspiring to the young adults as well as those of us in the audience. Speaking of his own experience in combat, as well as his career as a judge, he shared with the graduates that God is always with us directing our paths. The Idaho Home School Graduates have been honored to have Judge Eismann attending their ceremony for many years, and privileged to hear him speak.
Hope House Graduates 2010
Over the last several years, we have been introduced to Hope House in Marsing, a home for kids who have had failed adoptions. This year is the second graduation that we have attended there. What a privilege to be a part of these special young adults’ lives. Unlike the home school graduation, where the kids have had wonderful families to support them all their lives, these kids have been bounced around all their lives and have ended up at Hope House. Most of the graduates have been there at least all of high school, and consider Hope House their family. Only 1 of 4 graduates had any family there to speak on their behalf. Instead of formal music talent, we heard heart felt songs sang by the graduates. The overriding themes were of redemption and forever friendship. Hope House has lived up to its name by truly giving these kids hope.
Today, we are attending one more graduation at Covenant Academy, another special place. This school started out as a home school family helping other home school families about 25 years ago. They offer full-time and part-time enrollment, so they have not had many full-time graduates. Today’s graduation happens to be one of their own kids who wants to be president some day. He is a very bright young man with great future ahead of him. I expect another inspiring ceremony.
Thank you to all the graduates who have inspired us this year. Congratulations! May God richly bless you as you begin this new page of your lives.
I think I have said this before, but I want to say it again. I so appreciate my friends. It never ceases to amaze me at the longevity of many of my relationships.
Being involved in the community, gets you out into groups of like minded people. Whether it is church, or a group supporting a certain cause, or even your job, you can make friends that last. I am always encouraged when I can pick up a relationship that has been on hold for several years, and just dive right in. Sometimes, our lives get busy, or we move, and we loose touch. True friends can renew those friendships over lunch, catch up, get busy again, renew the friendships, catch up, get busy again… and not feel jolted. My hairdresser is an old friend who I found after being apart for several years. Now, we keep up when I get haircuts. I am blessed with many old friends in the community.
Unfortunately, there are many people who feel that they are abandoned if you do not stay in touch, or worse, you do not stay in their group. I am sure there are many people out there who feel I have left them at one time or another. My best friends, are those who I stay friends with even if I am not in constant contact. Hopefully we can all be that kind of friend, not dependent on what we get out of it, but there for the person when they need us. There are many life circumstances that can separate us from the best of friends, and then bring us back together at a later time.
Groups of like-minded people are a great way to develop these friendships. Church is the obvious place to meet like-minded people, and most of my friends share this most precious bond. Community groups are a great place to find similarities in life. At our last Search-Finders of Idaho meeting, we laughed about how long we had known each other. As our relationships with our birth families have progressed, we have shared this part of our lives with others who understood. At the Treasure Valley Down Syndrome Association, we have raised our children together, and shared the ups and downs of life that comes along with raising kids. I am grateful for all these groups in the community.
My friends, new and old, you know who you are… thank you for your friendship.
Registration for CWI iDream classes starts Monday, May 17! Go to any CWI location, and ask for the Community Education brochure, then look for the iDream classes, or go to the website http://www.cwidaho.cc/community-education/
Community Education has designed classes for the intellectually challenged who want to experience education and learning at the college. Support workers must accompany if assistance is needed during classes and while on-campus.
Please spread the word if you know of anyone who would be interested in attending!
Just a quick reminder that Search-Finders of Idaho meets tonight. This is a search and support group for all adoption triad members – adult adoptees, birth families, and adoptive family members are always welcome! We love it when you are there to support us!
The group meets at the Booth Children’s Home on Warm Springs av in Boise at 7:00 pm the second Thursday of every month.
My mom at Race for the Cure
Double the blessings – that is what it means to me to have two mothers. Being adopted at birth, and then reunited with my birth mother 20 years ago means that I have had two mothers and two families. Some people might consider this a curse, but to me, it is a blessing.
God knew what He was doing when He put me in the Gaver family. Despite some pretty treacherous teenage years, my mom never gave up on me. My mother continues to bless me today. Not only has she always supported my kids and I in school, and extra curricular activities, she is my biggest supporter in my personal life. She encourages me in my business ventures, giving me much needed advice and is always there if I just need someone to listen. My mom always has a positive attitude. Over the last few years, she has been plagued with health issues including two different cancers, but she keeps on going. She has not quit playing bridge, or going out with friends or traveling around the world! She enriches our lives by taking us to cultural events around town and telling us about the things she has learned at BSU lectures. This morning, she attended the Race for the Cure, walking 1 mile as a survivor of Breast Cancer, then she went with us to see Hello Dolly, an event in Boise Music Week, out to dinner, then to a comedy fundraiser for our group the Treasure Valley Down Syndrome Association. My mom is amazing!
God also knew that I needed to know my birth mother and her family. Those treacherous teenage years were the height of identity issues. Struggling to figure out who I was, I searched for and found her at age 25. Knowing my birth family was like being able to look in a mirror. It took many years before I had much of a relationship with any of them, but I got to know myself better. I like to think that I shared many things in common with my birth mother. She was a strong and determined, yet private woman. We lost my birth mother last year, but since then, I have met even more of my birth family and our relationships continue to grow. Learning about my heritage and my family has been a blast.
I celebrate my mothers on Mother’s Day. One, I treasure here with me for as long as I have her and one, I keep in my heart.
It’s almost here! This is the iDream program that I have been working on for students with intellectual disabilities. Please pass the word so that this first session will be a success!
Thanks, Joyce
iDREAM
Nampa Campus (*NAM)
Intellectual ~ Disabilities ~ Reaching ~ Educating ~ Achieving More
Welcome to iDream
Community Education has designed classes for intellectually challenged individuals who would like to experience education and learning at CWI. Support workers are not available and assistance must be provided during time on campus. Please participate in any or all classes and thanks for joining us!
(Class Enrollment Limited to 20 students)
Reading for Fun and Learning
Explore plot, setting, characters, and themes by using familiar and not so familiar stories along with many fun activities with teacher, Lesley McCandless.
T. & Th. 6/1-6/24 2:00p-2:50p $59
Countries Around the World
Learn world history from teacher, Lesley McCandless, by discussing and viewing movie clips from different countries.
T. & Th. 6/1-6/24 3:00p-3:50p $59
Beginning Spanish for You
Join Spanish teacher Lesley McCandless as she offers basic vocabulary and word phrases in an interactive and easy pace using engaging activities and songs.
T. & Th. 6/1-6/24 4:00p-4:50p $59
Awesome American Sign Language (ASL)
Michael Ames teaches the beautiful visual language of signing by using fingers to spell and to make numerals and symbols.
M. & W. 6/7-6/30 2:00p-2:50p $59
Art Art and More Art You will love your class with Kurt Scheffler. Don’t miss this interactive creative, fun, learning experience. M. & W. 6/7-6/30 3:00p-3:50p $59
Cool Drama Participate in imaginative acting focusing on natural creative play with teacher Jef Petersen. Wear comfortable clothing. M. & W. 6/2-6/30 4:00p-4:50p $59
The WRAP will be sent out in the Idaho Press Tribune on the 16th and registration is scheduled to begin on the 17th. Stop in at any CWI location.
For more information, contact IDthinkcollege@gmail.com
