Opportunities for students with intellectual disabilities are coming! The Community Education Department at College of Western Idaho is working on adding classes designed especially for these students. Hopefully, CWI will eventually develop a program designed especially for this group of students.
There are limited options for adults with intellectual disabilities. When they reach adulthood, they tend to become isolated or herded into developmental centers where they do not reach their full potential. College has proven to help anyone, disabled or not, grow and develop. Studies by Vocational Rehab have proven that people with intellectual disabilities (ID), who have gone to some kind of higher education, have more job opportunities and are able to earn higher salaries.
Following the example of many community colleges across the country, College of Western Idaho has begun the task of making college a possibility for this group of people. Students with ID are often times unable to meet the requirements of regular college degree programs. Despite the fact that they may be able to pass certain college classes, they are unable to pass entrance exams let alone fulfill all the general education requirements for most degrees. This disqualifies them from financial aide and discourages them from trying to attend college. College of Western Idaho is hoping to encourage Treasure Valley residents with ID to consider attending classes through the community education department.
During the summer of 2010, CWI hopes to offer classes in 4 week segments to see where the interest lies. Starting out, they will offer a variety of core classes, and electives at a slower speed to meet the needs of these students. Some of the subjects will be reading, Spanish, sign language, art, music, and computer skills. The number of students will dictate how many classes are offered. Consecutive classes will be offered during the day for 4 week sessions.
College of Western Idaho has been immensely popular since its beginning last year. The college has had a hard time keeping up with the needs of its students. We hope that this program for the intellectually disabled will be just as popular.
If you would like information about this program, would like to participate, or have something you would like to teach, please email IDthinkcollege@gmail.com.
The beautiful view from her house
Finding my birth family, despite the rough reunion, has been a blessing in my life. I found them 25 years ago which seems like a long time! I was not received well by anyone in the family except my aunt who is only 8 years my senior. Over time, they all allowed me to be a part of their lives. I certainly have not been able to see a great family resemblance all these years, but after 25 years, I have been able to see definite family traits in me.
Being in contact with my birth mother and then meeting her father, helped me to understand my own personality so much better. As I watched them, I realized that in many ways, I behaved just like they did. My friends and family had said things to me that I was now saying about my birth mother. It truly was like looking in a mirror. Despite being told all my life that I was mowing people over all my life, I did not realize what I had done until I saw my birth mother’s determined personality. She told me that she could out do any man and had fought all her life to be the best. This had been my attitude when I was younger, and could be seen in my oldest daughter as she applied to be a marine officer. The resemblance was uncanny!
I was adopted by two professionals who enjoyed city life over the country life. They are cultured, intelligent and refined. My birth family are ranchers from SW Texas. Idaho cowboys don’t have anything on these guys! My uncle has been the Marboro man and the Lone Star beer man! The stories that I heard from my grand father were amazing. My parents lived upright Christian lives. My birth family lives rather colorful lives. So, when this little girl with Texas blood grew up, my parents didn’t know what to do with me. I have been a bull-doser since my pre-teen years. I was raised in the city without any way to figure out who I was.
My birth mother never fully opened up to me before she died. A couple of years ago, she finally started to be concerned for me. Up until then, she would tell me about her life, but never seemed interested in me. I learned alot from our contact, but wished that we could be friends. She lived on an isolated island in the Bahamas which made contact more difficult. I met her 25 years ago soon after I found her, and then I didn’t see her again until 2 years ago, despite several trips to the Bahamas. When I was with her, she did not introduce me as her daughter – I was just another guest. When I visited, I had a great time, and I learned many things about her, but we did not become friends.
When she died, I went to the island to be at her funeral and to help take care of her estate. I never would have imagined how hard it would be. Before my arrival for the funeral, the people of the island had finally been told of my existence. She had lived there more than 30 years and very few people knew that she had a child. At the funeral, it was decided that I would speak first and tell everyone who I was as well as saying a few words about her. My aunt and I were the only relatives there, and the only ones to speak. Her ashes were sprinkled in the ocean without much ado. So it goes in the Bahamas.
I stayed a month in her house after the funeral. My aunt left after being called away for a medical emergency in Texas. In many ways, I felt like I was walking in my birth mother’s footsteps as I met her friends and took care of her business. As I walked this path, I grieved the loss more than I ever thought I would. I always had hope that she would accept me as her friend, but she never did. I admired this woman who had succeeded in many things, as well as failed in some. I had unknowingly walked some of the same paths and could empathize with her more than she would ever know. We could have had so much more, but it was not meant to be.
Living there with her friends and co-workers, people seemed to recognize me and I had many comments about the similarities people saw between my birth mother and I. I stood like her, I walked like her, I argued like her. Weird! Never before had people treated me in such a way. I heard many stories about her that I could relate to, that I will treasure. This little island and its people stole my heart. I long to go back.
After losing her, I feel more compelled to know and treasure the rest of my birth family. I look forward to another visit to the island and to Texas someday. Lord willing, my birth family, this island and its people will be a blessing for the rest of my life.
My birth aunt and my daughter
Adoptees can experience an identity crisis as they go through life without birth relatives. Identical twins that have grown up separately are known to dress in similar fashion, have similar jobs, and behaviors. Reunited family members find similarities that seem impossible – they might sit on their feet, separate their food on the plate or talk with the same inflections. Seeing yourself in a family member can be compared to seeing yourself in a mirror. Because most of us have a hard time with self-perception, it is helpful to see yourself in another person. The commonality with another person creates a bond with that person – birds of a feather flock together… As an adoptee is exposed to his birth family (even remotely), it helps them to form a fuller understanding of themselves.
Why isn’t the adoptee’s family enough to meet these needs? The adoptive family meets the adoptee’s needs for parents. Unfortunately, many people, who have not experienced a break in the birth family relationship, do not understand that the adoptee is not looking for new parents. For better or for worse, you are stuck with your parents. An adoptive parent is wise to realize the need for their child to find the missing part of themselves. Statistics tell us that 80% of reunions end very favorably. 20% of those found are not wanting to be found and are hopefully given the right to say no. My search, and the search of our current president of Search-Finders of Idaho, would be considered one of the 20%. My birthmother was not happy to be found, but eventually warmed up a little. Her family was not welcoming to me either, but after 25 years, they have decided that I am not a threat. Our president’s mother never did admit that she was her mother, however, she has contact with her siblings. Would we do it again? YES because it is not about finding more parents.
To find help in the Treasure Valley, go to Search-Finders of Idaho, the 2nd Thursday of every month at the Booth Memorial Children’s Home on Warm Springs Ave in Boise, or contact Independent Search Consultants for a search consultant in your area.
Search and support groups and search consultants can be found in nearly every state and many foreign countries. Most of these people are those involved with stranger adoptions (adoptions outside of the birth family). What drives these adoptees and birth families to search for their lost relatives? Adoptees are asked these questions: Aren’t you happy with their adoptive families? Don’t you realize that in most cases, you were unwanted and you need to leave well enough alone? Birth parents / siblings are asked: Why would you want to disturb your child / siblings life? Adoption is a world where lies have dominated for so long that the participants are often afraid to reconsider the status quo. We had a saying in our search and support group – Fantasies flourish where facts are unknown.
What drives these family members to search? Birth ties are an unusual thing. There are no words in our language to truly describe the relationship between separated birth family members.
The obvious reason for most adoptees to search is to find information regarding medical issues and a sense of identity. This can be different for each person. Some children grow up wondering what their nationality is, or why they act differently than their family, but some grow up never giving it a second thought until they get married and have their own children. For men, especially, the need to know comes later in life.
Along with the more obvious identity issues, there seems to be an attraction among family members. Proverbs tells us that the glory of a son is his father. (Prov. 17:6) Even in abuse situations, a child is still drawn to his father. Just like marriage creates a oneness that is hard to explain, the birth family bond is indescribable. The Greek language may help when it comes to the word love. Phileo is brotherly love. In a reunion, there can be feelings of Phileo love. Most families display this feeling naturally, but seeing a family member that is a stranger is very awkward. Because these types of feelings are not common to most social situations, and there are no words to describe them, the birth family members are left with a feeling that only they can understand. Adoption triad search and support groups address these feelings and can provide support to birth families. To find help in the Treasure Valley, go to Search-Finders of Idaho, the 2nd Thursday of every month at the Booth Memorial Children’s Home on Warm Springs Ave in Boise, or contact Independent Search Consultants for a search consultant in your area.
Two years ago, the state of Idaho began the My Voice, My Choice program, which is a program for adults who are currently on the Developmentally Delayed Waiver to self-direct their own care with the help of a “circle of support”. The Self-Directed model is being used in states throughout the US and is helping developmentally delayed adults to become more independent and live fuller lives. According to the Pas Center, (http://www.pascenter.org/state_based_stats/medicaid_waiver_2005.php?state=idaho) there are approximately 1860 participants in the Developmentally Delayed Waiver program in the state of Idaho. After 2 years of the My Voice, My Choice program, approximately 100 people have switched from traditional services to the self –direction program. Since it is a much better program, why aren’t people embracing it?
Because the Self-Direction program is best suited for a person who has a strong “circle of support”, most care-givers and parents are afraid that the program will be burdensome. A “circle of support” can be anyone who is affiliated with the client and cares about his / her welfare. Most of the time, the “circle of support” is made up of the primary care giver, family members, friends, and people who are hired to support the client such as the support broker and community support workers. The support broker, the person in charge of writing and helping to implement the plan, can be someone who is close to the client, or a qualified support broker who you chose from the list at Health and Welfare. A strong “circle of support” is not the same as a strong family, or primary care givers who are doing all the planning. Once a “circle of support” is developed, the program is not burdensome.
There are four types of people involved in Self-Direction, the participant, the support broker, the fiscal agent (handles the money), and the community support workers. An advantage to this program is that the participant can hire his family and his friends, however, his family and friends may not want to work for him. If the family of the participant does not want to be involved as an employee of the participant, it is up to the support broker to find qualified people to support the participant. Success in the program is due to a strong “circle of support” and these four types of people, whoever they are.
Self-Direction is great for the participant who wants his family involved as well as the participant who does not want his family involved. Individuals who would like to live independently of their parents / care givers in a supported living situation do not need to hire their family to supervise their living situation. There are successful married couples across the country living in supported living situations on self-direction programs. Families who want to use self-direction, but do not want to “do all the work” can depend more on the support broker to handle paperwork, hiring and firing of support workers and payroll issues that come up. Self-direction is great for participants who want to be more in control of their lives not, depending on their family situation.
As a parent of a participant in self-direction, and a qualified support broker, I am excited about the possibilities of My Voice, My Choice Self direction in Idaho. Because there are no agencies involved with self direction, it can be a lonely road. I see a need for a network of self directed people and their “circles of support”. I am working toward a network that will act as a larger “circle of support” for all self-directed people in Idaho. I am currently working on a website that will be called IdahoSelfDirection.com that will be a place to network and share ideas. If you have questions about the Idaho Self Direction Network or My Voice, My Choice, write Idahoselfdirection@gmail.com or go to the My Voice, My Choice website.
The Adoption Triad, made up of Birth parents, Adoptive parents, and Adoptees is made up of people who suffered loss and may not have been given the chance to grieve. Adoption is the only situation where a loss has occurred and the people involved are supposed to be grateful. The closed stranger adoptions of the past were shrouded in secrecy and often times, lies. The attempt to cover up a birth mother’s indiscretions and the adoptive parent’s infertility can not be covered up with the band-aid of adoption.
A birth parent’s loss is the most obvious of all the losses in adoption. They must grieve the loss of a child, but it has no closure, no end. Birth parents are known to be reminded daily of their child by news articles or glances of a same age child in the store. Wondering the fate of their child, they are unable to move on as they were promised. Of course, not all birth parents live in regret about relinquishing their children, there are other emotions associated with the act of relinquishing a child that can haunt a parent unless they are worked through. Unlike most mothers today, mothers who had an unplanned pregnancy, 20 plus years ago, still had to deal with the stigma and shame of being an unwed mother. Some carry guilt and regret with them for the rest of their lives. Many times, they do not believe that they have the right to make contact with their adult child. A birth parent’s loss can affect them their whole life.
The grief caused by infertility is often times swept under the rug in the adoption process. Instead of working through the grief to a point of healing, some parents seek a quick fix to thier pain. Before the legalization of abortion, there were plenty of babies for adoption, so the process was much easier. Adoption agencies did their best to match race and backgrounds so that the child would blend in the family and the child would not appear to be adopted, thus lessening the shame of infertility and being relinquished for adoption. Nowadays, unwed pregnancies and the plight of infertility does not hold the same stigma that it did years ago. Once the parents have peace about their inability to have children, they can move on with their lives. Many times, they are able to work in a field with children and do a wonderful job. If they decide to adopt, an infertile couple may have to adopt an older child, or an orphan whose race is different than their own, but this is no longer a cause for shame. Because these children can present more challenges, it is important to be a healthy parent. A child should not be adopted to relieve the pain of a parent who has lost his/her own children due to infertility, but to help resolve the pain in a child’s life.
Finally, there is the adopted child who has lost his birth family, but has been told that he / she is special, chosen, and should be grateful. As an infant, the child is seemingly ignorant of his / her plight, but as he grows, he is aware of this thing called adoption. Depending on how it is handled, it can be confusing to him, and even cause guilt in the child as he grows. Unfortunately, there are the adoptive parents, who are insecure and scared of the thought of a birth parent reappearing in their child’s life. Referring back to their unresolved grief over losing their own birth children, they are scared of losing their adopted children as well. Many children who grow up in this situation are not told of their adoption, or have been convinced that they should never search for their birth parents. Open adoptions of today try to acknowledge the child’s loss issues by better preparing the adoptive parents to deal with the loss of their birth parents honestly. Adoptive parents enter into the adoption process knowing that their child will have access to his / her birth parent and chose to help the child work through the challenges that will be caused by the adoption. The child can be grateful for people in his life that will love him through this process.
My own adoption was handled very well by my adoptive parents. Despite the fact that they told me from the time I was very young that I was adopted, I grew up confused and angry. As a child, I had temper tantrums that were unexplainable until my wise mother figured out that I was upset about adoption. She took the time to explain it to me again, and the fits stopped. Unfortunately, the fits resurfaced again in the form of teen rebellion in my early teen years. My poor parents did not know what hit them as I became out of control struggling with identity and loss issues. Despite the challenges in our relationship, when I was 19, my parents were not too intimidated to help me in my search for my birth parents. Through Search-Finders of California, I did find my birth family, but we would be in the 20% of not so favorable reunions. Knowing my birth family now for over 25 years, we have grown closer, however, relating to me must have brought back tremendous pain for my birth mother, who never had any more children; she was only willing to open up to me on her limited terms. Despite the challenges in these relationships, knowing them has helped me work through identity issues that I have had all my life. At my birth mother’s death last year, the loss issues were greater than I would have imagined. Having had a limited relationship with her, and then losing it suddenly, finalized the loss I had dealt with all my life. Painfully, and with my adoptive mother by my side, I have worked through this loss and am healthier than ever before. Looking back on what my adoptive mother had to put up with, and the fact that she and my Dad loved me through it, makes me grateful to have had them in my life. (My Adoption Story) Loss, if dealt with properly can be a great tool that God can use to shape your life, but it can not be ignored or it creates more problems.
Any adoption, to a stranger, or within a family brings with it loss. Keeping families together is the only way to avoid this loss, but if a family must be separated for unforeseen reasons, it must be seen as loss and dealt with accordingly. Parents, who have not been able to raise the children they bore or the children they wanted, must deal with the loss of what could have been. Abused children need to deal with the loss of the abusive parent. Orphans have lost parents / family. And adoptees, who have never known their birth families have lost those relationships and must eventually deal with the loss, or deal with the pain which results from the loss. Even children who have lost a parent to divorce will need to address these issues if the parent is no longer in their lives. Gaining a step-parent does not cover up the children’s pain of losing a parent. Each member of the Adoption Triad will inevitably play the “what if” game if loss is not dealt with. There are now many support options for the Adoption triad including search and support groups all over the country. In Boise, Idaho, we have Search-Finders of Idaho which meets at the old Booth Memorial children’s home on Warm Springs Avenue on the 2nd Thursday of every month.
Yesterday, Becky and I met with some administrators at College of Western Idaho regarding college for the Intellectually Disabled. There are many adults in our community who would like to go to college, but are unable to meet the requirements for regular classes, or keep up in regular classes. Some of these people can read and write, some have skills and talents that we do not have, but their weaknesses keep them out of college. Instead of the choice of college at 18 years old, they are encouraged to to choose a developmental center where they will be socialized with their own kind, and learn life skills. Granted, there are many life skills that these people lack, but unfortunately, these are not taught in the developmental centers. These people can benefit from an integrated college program where they learn how to be a contributing part of our community. Just as we all benefit from higher education, so do the Intellectually Disabled. Vocational Rehab has done studies that show that the Intellectually Disabled can increase their earning potential significantly by attending college. (www.Thinkcollege.net) The character development that we see in any young adult who goes to college is also seen in young adults with Intellectually Disabilities. The administrators of CWI agreed that the Intellectually Disabled also deserved the chance to attend college.
Currently, the College of Western Idaho offers many classes that this population can take advantage of. My daughter Becky, who has Down syndrome has been enjoying the Community Education classes offered at CWI. Although they are not classes for credit, she is learning new things and is taking classes on a college campus which satisfies her desire to “go to college”. There are other classes in the Basic Education Program that students with Intellectual Disabilities could take advantage of. Eventually, we hope to develop classes to meet the needs of students with Intellectual Disabilities. Our first goal will be to examine all the options at the college and find the classes that this population would be interested in.
While developing a course curriculum list, we will also need to develop a marketing strategy, or network for getting in touch with this community. Our second goal would be to find out from the Idaho Intellectually Disabled Community which classes they would be interested in. I have begun a list of contacts, but will need help to develop it. Anyone interested in this project can contact me at IDthinkcollege@gmail.com.
This will be a project that may take years to develop to its full potential, but we are excited to get started down that road!
There is a news story keeping me up at night. The Baptist Missionaries arrested for child trafficking are old friends of mine. On one hand, I am worried sick about them, and yes, I am praying for them, but on the other hand, I shake my head, and pray for mercy on them. One of them is an 18 year old home schooler who grew up with my kids.
The Prime Minister Max Bellerive has to make some decisions about their innocence and motives. He is not Sadaam, but this is Haiti and they have never been known for being nice. They have had a history of child trafficking problems, and now, they are in a crisis. One News Now reports “But Bellerive said some legal system must determine whether the Americans were acting in good faith as they claim or are child traffickers in a nation that has struggled to fight exploitation of children.” We all know them and know that they were acting in good faith, and are not child trafficking, but again, this is Haiti. The news is reporting that they knowingly were breaking the rules. “Haiti’s prime minister says it’s clear to him that the ten U.S. Baptists who tried to take 33 children out of his quake-ravaged country without permission “knew what they were doing was wrong.”" (One News Now) The fact that according to the plans for the Dominican Republic orphanage, New Life Children’s Refuge, this appears to be part of an adoption program. Dear Lord, have mercy on them.
The Christian American assumption that we can go in and rescue people is flawed. Are we so arrogant to think that everyone will see our good motives and agree with our judgments of the situation just because we are Christian Americans? My friends, you have fallen prey to this mentality. The American judgment is that a child would be better off in America with “good” parents, than in a impoverished country with their own family. Who should make those kinds of judgments besides God? He controls a person’s birth place and birth family. Who are we to decide that it is not good enough for the child? God saves, not us. Sometimes, we are privileged to be a part of His work, but He does not work like this.
The calling on a person’s life should be based in scripture and truth, not based in feelings of compassion and or a knee jerk reaction to tragedy. There are times that we are overwhelmed with grief over a situation, but we must let God do the fixing. We must stand by the principles of scripture such as to obey those in authority. The mandate of James 1:27 is: “Pure and undefiled religion before God and the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their trouble, and to keep oneself unspotted from the world.” Go walk with these people through thier trouble, bring them food and water, but don’t take them away from their families in the name of Christianity.
Thank God that the Haitian government is taking the time to deal with these missionaries and that if they end up in court, it will probably be American. There are consequences to our actions, even as Christians. For us to assume (again) that God will rescue them just because their motives were right, would be wrong. My friends, we know you, but the world hates you as scripture says. We must be above reproach in a fallen world. Again, my prayer is that God would have mercy on you as you move through this potentially corrupt “judicial” system.
Adoption is a good choice. My birthmother chose life for me, and my adoptive parents chose to provide a full life for me. Many unplanned children are not given life these days and many unplanned children are kept in birth families who are ill – equipped for children. Not all adoptions work out well, but neither do all natural families (that is why we have adoption…). Adoptive parents and natural parents all have the ability to hurt their children. We are not talking about those exceptions today. Those parents who take on children who are abused or disabled may end up facing the painful reality of their children’s situations, but those children are blessed that someone cared enough to try. Adoption does not solve problems created by unplanned pregnancies, abusive situations, refugees or orphans, or even infertile couples, it only takes it in a new direction that holds more promise than the original situation.
. Since the beginning of time, there have been orphans in desperate need. Adoption is a concept mentioned in the Old and New Testament of the Bible. Esther was adopted by Mordecai (Esther 2:15) God chose us before the foundation of the world and adopts us into the family of God (Eph 1:3-5 …In love 5 he predestined us to be adopted as his sons…NIV) . He is the example of a perfect adoptive parent. As I grew up and became rebellious, my parents regretted adopting me as I caused them unthinkable pain. God knew that I would be rebellious and he chose to adopt me anyway. My parents gave me an example of God’s unconditional love when they did not feel love. God sent His own son to die on a cross to demonstrate His love for me and make a way to bring me into the family of God. Adoption is an age old Biblical concept based in loving a child who is in desperate need.
Governing adoption practices began in the 19th century when people began to work toward making adoption a legal way to fix the problem of unplanned pregnancy. The stigma of being a baby born out of wedlock (the term bastard) would be covered up and the child who was innocent of wrong doing, would have a new chance at life. Infertile couples were able to connect with a child in need so that they too could be parents. In the beginning, secrecy enveloped adoption practices. Stories of accidental deaths of birth parents covered up the shame of unwed pregnancies. Because the shame of an unwed pregnancy had devastating effects on birth mothers, some were sent away from their homes and confined to a home for unwed mothers. Some of these practices continue to this day. In some states, adoptees still do not have the right to their own pre-adoption birth certificate. In fact, if they are not told of their adoption, they may not even know they are adopted. Those making laws have since realized that two wrongs don’t make a right.
Today, adoption practices in the United States have changed dramatically due to the decline in babies available for adoption. The unwed mothers homes are all but extinct. Many of these facilities are now used to help children in trouble, and to aid in open adoptions. Some of these facilities have been shut down for illegal adoption practices, such as the Willows Maternity Sanitarium where I was born. Because of the huge shift in the attitude toward pregnancy out of wedlock, these facilities are no longer needed. The CDC reports: “Most births to teenagers (86% in 2007) are nonmarital, but 60% of births to women 20–24 and nearly one-third of births to women 25–29 were nonmarital in 2007.” http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/databriefs/db18.pdf “Fewer infants are available for men and women to adopt now than in the past. Never-married women continue to be the most likely group of women to relinquish an infant for adoption (4,5). Looking at births to never-married women prior to 1973, about 9% of infants overall and 20% of infants born to white never-married women were relinquished. For births occurring between 1996 and 2002, only 1% of babies born to never-married women were relinquished by their mothers for adoption within the first month of the babies’ lives.” http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/databriefs/db12.pdf Over the last 10 years, abortion rates are going down, but more and more non-hispanic white women are opting to keep their babies and raise them alone. “Among unmarried women, 51 percent of pregnancies in 2004 ended in live birth with 35 percent ending in abortion. This represented a considerable shift from 1990, when 43 percent ended in live birth and 47 percent ended in abortion”. The rates for black women remained unchanged. http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/nvsr/nvsr56/nvsr56_15.pdf These statistics have seriously changed adoption practices in the United States.
If adoption is for the benefit of the child, adoptive parents are those who should be looking out for the children in need. Unfortunately, not all adoption is for the sake of the child, but for the infertile couples. The practice of child trafficking and baby selling is definitely in the interest of the adoptive parent and those who profit from this kind of adoption. Overseas adoption practices have increased as Americans have become aware of children in need in impoverished countries, however, foreign orphanages have been used to find children for adoptive parents for years. In the United States, due to the rise of single parenting and abortion, most of the needy children are in the foster care system. Many people have chosen to adopt orphans from third world countries who are definitely children in need. Adoption is no longer a system made to only fix the problem of unplanned pregnancy, but to solve the problem of orphans and unfortunately the problem of infertility. Because of the nature of adoption these days, the secrecy and deception, that were once a part of the process, are not seen as much. Open adoptions are practiced regularly even in the few infant adoptions that occur. Providing love to a child in need is the primary purpose of adoption.
Those of us affected by adoption can have varied reactions to it. It seems to be an ever evolving, ever changing practice. Because we will always have orphans, we will always have some form of adoption. Adoption is a good, Biblically based ideal. After all, what a greater calling than to give love to a child in need. James 1:26-27 Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress NIV Chose life. Chose adoption.
Self-Direction, what does it mean? There are 5 principles that stand for self-direction. From the ARC (Association of Retarded Citizens) to the Self-Direction program in Maryland to the Self-Direction program in Idaho, these 5 words are used to define the mind set.
- Freedom
- Authority
- Support
- Responsibility
- Confirmation
These 5 words are not always used to describe the intellectually disabled. Years of prejudice have caused us to see this group of people as unable to contribute to society and unable to have a say in their own lives. Self Direction is not just a program, but a new way to look at this group of people. Giving them the Freedom to make choices about their lives can be scary to the care givers who are used to making all the decisions. Giving them the Authority to have a say in how to spend the money spent on their behalf can seem risky. Support makes it possible to implement these principles. Responsibility for the choices they make and the public dollars they are spending demands growth and maturity in the individual. Confirmation continues to recognize that the individual has control of his/her own life. These are new concepts in the care of the intellectually disabled.
These principles are basic ideas that we use in parenting. To bring a child to maturity, we must teach them to have responsibility and control over their own life. We have to give them freedom and authority over their choices for them to learn how to govern themselves. We give them support in their decisions and walk with them through their consequences if they stumble. These parenting principles will develop mature responsible adults able to self-direct their own lives to the best of their abilities.
Self-Direction programs for the intellectually disabled have gained popularity across the country. Self-Direction develops Self-Advocates who educate the community as they advocate for their own rights. As our attitudes continue to change in regard to the disabled, hopefully, we will see them integrated into our communities where they can greatly contribute. As more and more people interact with the disabled and benefit from their presence, we will see less prejudice toward them. Self-Direction programs are definitely a step in the right direction!
For more information about Self – Determination in Idaho, click on the My Voice, My Choice link or email me at writeapage@gmail.com
